Social media has been blamed for an increase in anxiety and depression among young people and also brings cyberbullying and exposure to inappropriate content.
But technology and social media are here to stay, and it takes more than simply taking away a child’s phone to keep them safe.
Sandy De Silva, executive director of Family Centre, said it is critical to help every child develop a healthy relationship with social media.
Is your child at risk?
“Parents need to understand that social media follows a child wherever they go – whether they are online or offline,” Dr De Silva said.
“When a child has a healthy relationship with social media, they exhibit a clarity of intention and can tell you why they are online, be that to connect with friends, perform research, complete homework or do online shopping.
“More importantly, they are able to put down their phone without experiencing stress. They do not derive their self-image from how long it takes for someone to reply to their message, or how many likes their Instagram post received.”
In contrast, adolescents who have a problematic relationship with social media are often unable to disengage from their phone without experiencing anxiety or depression. Other symptoms include significant mood shifts after being online, withdrawal from family activities, disrupted sleep patterns and declining school performance.
Cyberbullying
According to Dr De Silva, cyberbullying is a very real issue in Bermuda, and parents should never downplay its seriousness, whether their child is the victim or the one engaging in harmful behaviour.
It’s crucial for parents to remain alert to any signs that their child may be experiencing bullying, as many young victims are hesitant to confide in a counsellor or the police.
Often, they hope the problem will simply disappear if they ignore it. Yet the consequences of cyberbullying can affect the victim’s well-being today and have far-reaching personal and even future employment implications for them and family members. What is shared online can live on indefinitely.
Inappropriate content
Never assume your child is navigating social media and the internet responsibly.
“The harm that unchecked, unfiltered use can cause is immeasurable,” Dr De Silva warned.
Inappropriate content for children and teens includes any material depicting violence or self-harm, drug use, cutting, dangerous stunts, risky behaviour or sexual content.
According to Dr De Silva, risky behaviour can be broadly defined as anything that undermines the overall wellbeing of a young person.
It can be difficult to identify types of content that may appear harmless at first glance but can subtly and negatively influence a child’s mindset. Understanding what draws your child in – and why – is crucial to guiding them safely through the digital landscape.
“Even if you have placed filters on your child’s phone to limit their usage, their friends may have different – or no filters – and either send them inappropriate content, or show it to them on their device,” she cautioned.
“It is essential for parents to be curious and ask their children if they have seen anything interesting, or that worried them online.
“You cannot ever be certain what will influence them because the content that they are exposed to is so vast.”
Healthy life skills
Talk to anyone with a child who has an online device, and the question quickly becomes: how can you teach a child to use social media without being controlled by it?
The answer, it turns out, is that it takes a village.
In Bermuda, laptops are now required for all high school students, so even if they don’t have a cell phone, young people can still set up a free profile on a social media site such as Instagram or Snapchat.
“Certainly, schools need to do their part by having clean policies regarding cell phone usage during school hours, as well as education regarding how to be safe online,” Dr De Silva said.
“But parents also need to model healthy behaviour at home.”
Dr De Silva recommends that parents:
- actively demonstrate that they can limit their own screen time
- set boundaries regarding when and how long children may be online
- ban device usage at mealtime
- remove devices from bedrooms at night for children under the age of 16
- actively engage in regular conversations with their children regarding safe internet usage
- actively discuss and discourage engaging in any form of cyberbullying or circulating any form illicit content
- seek guidance if you suspect that your child may be at risk
Teaching self-regulation
While many parents and schools provide education on appropriate, safe, and responsible internet use, it’s equally important for teens to take ownership of their online behaviour and commit to developing healthy, responsible habits.
It is never appropriate for a minor to circulate images of their peers without clothing, regardless of whether they think it is funny or a prank. In Bermuda, this is a crime.
“Regardless of your age, it is illegal to pass on images that depict another person being harmed or child pornography,” Dr De Silva said.
The Bermuda Police Service states on its website that any sexual images of individuals, who are under the age of consent, are classified as child abusive images or what is commonly known as, child pornography.
Anyone who knowingly distributes, transmits, makes available, imports or exports child abusive material or child pornography is guilty of an offence under the Criminal Code Amendment Act 2007.
If you receive such images, do not share them. Contact 211, or call police on 295-0011, or the Vulnerable Persons Unit on 247-1678, to make a report. Delete the images from your phone or other electronic device.
For further information on Family Centre, visit www.tfc.bm or call 232-1116.
