A cancer diagnosis can change life in an instant, bringing emotional and practical challenges that can be difficult to navigate.
In the beginning, patients are often surrounded by medical professionals, family and friends offering reassurance, assistance and emotional support.
But as the initial shock of the diagnosis begins to fade, patients can feel they’re left to handle the realities of living with a long-term illness on their own.
When the initial shock fades
While many chronic conditions, such as obesity, diabetes and high blood pressure, can limit both quality and length of life, few diagnoses carry the same sense of uncertainty and apprehension as cancer. In the past, a cancer diagnosis often meant a significantly shortened life expectancy, but thanks to advances in detection and treatment, this is no longer necessarily the case.
“Cancer was once an ominous diagnosis, but every year treatments and outcome projections improve, meaning that more and more people are living with cancer long-term,” said Colleen English DeGrilla, executive director of Pals Cancer Care in Bermuda.
This is good news, of course, but living longer with cancer brings many challenges. As time passes, those around the patient may start to assume things are getting back to normal. For the person living with cancer, however, the need for practical and emotional support may be far from over.
“It’s quite common for patients to experience a sense of emotional abandonment,” Ms English DeGrilla said.
“They don’t want to be a burden to those around them, so they suffer in silence. ‘I’m fine, but I’m really not’ is something we hear patients confide all the time.
Navigating uncertain times
“One of the biggest misconceptions about a cancer diagnosis is that you just need to adjust to some sort of a ‘new normal’,” Ms English DeGrilla said.
“There is no new normal – cancer is a journey that changes you as a person.
“Any life-threatening illness causes most people to re-evaluate their priorities in life, and your needs and priorities will continue to change the further you go.”
She said patients need to become their own advocates.
“You have to find the courage to take a risk and tell someone what you need, whether you think it’s big or small, because people often appreciate knowing how they can help.
“Let your friends and family know if you need a drive to medical appointments, help running errands, someone to collect the grocery shopping or help doing the laundry. You never know who might be more than happy to assist.”
Getting the support you need
Connecting with others who understand what you are going through at one of Pals’ group activities provides an opportunity to share experiences, exchange practical advice and gain a new perspective.
Asking for help is not a sign that you are failing and, for some, simply knowing that there is somewhere they can turn to for help can make a big difference.
“One of our patients remarked that just walking through the door of Pals is like receiving a hug,” Ms English DeGrilla said.
“We are also available to assist with wound care, psychological adjustment and financial support to help you get the treatment you need.”
While accessing the many services offered by Pals does require a doctor’s referral, Ms English DeGrilla encourages anyone who is unsure what assistance is available or where to begin to give them a call or stop by the office.
For more information, visit https://pals.bm.
